Friday, June 5, 2015

Always Coming Home

Questions. Saul opened his eyes as the fog lifted and the pain began. The surgery was over; he finally can start living as he really is—as she really is. It was a long road. Saul struggled her whole life with who she was and how people saw her. Now the final surgery was over: gender reassignment.

Saul started living as Irene years ago, but only started taking hormones recently. As her body changed she felt better about herself. It never went fast enough, of course. The changes were subtle at first. The photo library made it easier to see the changes.

Then it was time for the surgeries. Ten hours of surgery changed her face and voice as the hormones changed her skin and chest. Irene was disappointed at first. The doctor told her it would take time before the surgery fully took shape. Irene smiled more as she saw the improvement. Once she healed she needed more surgery to make her look completely female. It was always painful at first. The results were hard to see right away. Then the surgery did its magic.

Gender reassignment was the last surgery for Irene. Also the most painful. Irene groaned as she woke. She reached down but thick bandages covered her so she could not tell if her parts were really changed. Then the questions started racing through her mind. Did I do the right thing? It was more fear of what lies ahead than doubts if she should have made the complete transition.

As the weeks progressed Irene healed. When the bandages came off she knew she was finally in the body she was supposed to be in. The questions ended as the joy rose. Irene forgot about Saul. Life was brighter, happier than ever before. She built the life that felt natural to her. As the years moved by she fell in love and married. Irene had finally come home.


  1. I'm Pre-Op and feel like that a lot. IF I ever get GRS, I'm pretty sure I won't have any regrets because I've wanted (for SO LONG) to NOT have an appendage hanging between my legs. The day it finally happens, I will be ELATED !!!

  2. Thank you for sharing, Alana. My inspiration for this post came from a Bruce, now Caitlyn Jenner news piece where it was reported she questioned her choice for a short while. I agree with you, Alana. I think Caitlyn had questions due to the massive media coverage, nothing else. I wish you the best, Alana. I know you will have no regrets. Please, when the wonderful day gets closer, share with the readers here. Call us a mini support group from around the world.

    1. Aww.....Thank you SO MUCH, sweetie. :-D

  3. Amazing cap kay. And good luck to you Alana